Leaving the Forced Smile:::..

School has been out on summer break for nine days now. I'm not exactly sure when that happened. It feels like the time has slipped out of my hand.

I'm excited for this weekend! A few weeks ago I signed up for a weekend lecture series on professional writing. For me this sounds fun. But most people that I tell about it they think I'm crazy. Oh well.. I will go see how it is. It's only four days.

This morning I got up at six in hopes that my days would stop running away from me. After a friends graduation in the last week I stayed out till one-thirty and didn't get in bed till three. Lets just say that the sun was in the mid-day position and all the clocks in the house said it was noon before I got up the next day. And that night I was back in bed by ten. Oh.. That might be where some of my days went!
Good to know!

Me and my coffee sit here, and in joint effort are writing this morning. Such a sad concept.

The other day I started reading the book "Wild at Heart". Not only is it a really good book. But it makes one start thinking. My poor Sunday school kids ended up getting sucked into a discussion on Sunday about the subject on my mind. It was a great class though! I haven't gone on such a tangent in quite a while during class. Usually we stick to the the lesson I make. But Sunday one of the kids was mumbling about Obama. And even though I didn't vote for our current president. Nor did I petition anyone else to. I tried to make it clear to this kid that our nation voted for Obama. So he started to say that people are starting to see the error of their way and that they are turning away from what society is feeding them.

It only dawned on me then just how much children listen. But only to bits and pieces that then they place into their version of reality. In honesty I think most adults do that too. Just taking a look at society today will show you that.

So this is what started us talking about how their are many people pulling Obama's puppet strings and how Obama is showing the true colors of many many peoples twisted beliefs.

This then brought up the question of, Where are all the Christian's and what are they doing? Some how in this day an age Satan is winning.

More than anything Satan wants Christians to be silent, and hide their true feelings behind a fake smiling mask! Why? Why is Satan so scared of us? Why on earth would Satan me afraid of little ol' me?

I'm just a girl. Sometimes I feel better about myself than other times. Some times I feel as though I am running as fast as I can so the world's view doesn't catch and devour me. Recently, God stopped my running. In my eyes, it is always better to stay two steps ahead. But what if you just stand still?

Stand still and cling to God like a cat facing water submersion! Many, many tears and lots of prayer has gotten me to this point in my thinking. Stand your ground and open your mouth. Don't worry about if you will offend someone.

For a good soiled year now I have been going through King David's story with my tweens. David had a highly trusted general/friend/advisor named Joab. So not only was Joab one of David's closet friends, but he was also his most trusted advisor. And together they faced the battles that God laid before them to fight, that is where the general part comes in. So many times David and Joab had one anothers backs. Pointing God out to each other when need be.
But then something shook their happy universe. Joab killed Absalom (David's son who was trying to kill David.) David couldn't do it. Killing his son was something that needed to be done, because he was an evil man that was against God. But David saw only his son. Someone he held near and dear. Where as Joab saw what needed done no matter the pain caused, both to himself and to David.

Some may see my point of view as cold or unfeeling. But what is kinder, essentially lying to someone you love? Telling them that whatever wrong is alright because that is how they see it. And since you would hate to rock the boat, even knowing it is wrong, keep your mouth glued shut with a forced smile. Or is shedding light on what is wrong nicer? Talk it out, pray about it, think about it, and see what God says about it.

The fake smiles technique is the way Christianity in the United States has gone. Where is the boldness that once gripped the saved souls of this nation? Why force the smile? Why not force the issue God has given you the words to stand for or against? Because it is easier to run off to our youth group/church family/Bible study group and hide. Never again to be seen or heard. Stay sugary sweet, tame, unable to use the voice God gave you!

I know all of this well. I have done it. Slowly God is taking me to a point where I have to use my voice. Stand up with out any support but my God's. It feels like the supports are being kicked out from under neath of me. God places people in my life and takes them out when necessary. He is the only constant. That is something completely new to me. Just me and God.. How foreign is that?