Bridges. New ones and Burnt ones.

I can't believe how long it's been since my last blog update. So much has happened in just eight months, and even more as I look over the last year and a half. I have learned so much about myself and my God. I look back and think, "Wow, this not where I expected to be. And these aren't the people I expected to be with."
But I am happy here. God's shown me how to be content with where He has placed me, instead of discontent in his plan.

Probably the biggest reason that I haven't posted is so many interpersonal, Ashley and God, big things have happened. I didn't want to use my blog as a place to vent. But now I do want to share where I have been.

About a year and a half ago God taught me a huge lesson about relationships. My closest relationship outside of my family had crumbed into tiny pieces and blew away in a matter of a month. For about three months I kind of became a hermit. But it gave me a real chance to hang on to My God for dear life. Now I realized that my priorities were wrong. And that it was probably a good thing to have a break in the relationship. But as I went through it I really struggled. But He has taught me a hard lesson. Everyone is dealing with something. And I shouldn't take anyone for granted. Accept people for who they are, where they are. Through it all God has provided so many new and different relationships for me.

My brother is seven months out of surgery and doing great! The surgeon and his PA did a great job of sitting down with my family and explaining what was about to happen... Again. This wasn't our first rodeo. It was kind of my first though. Jake was a baby and I was ten when he had his first surgery. And I spent most of the time at friends houses. This time I was at the hospital all day, everyday he was inpatient. I spent my time watching the tubes and wires and stabilizing his scar every time he had to cough. He was inpatient for only four days! But then there was a 16 week recovery time. Thankfully his time at the hospiatl is actually helping me with nursing school! Because not only are we at the same hospital for clinicals BUT we are about to study pre and post-op procedures. :)
It was surprising to me at times who was there for our family and who wasn't. My friend who had been so instrumental in helping me through the first surgery was no longer in my life. And there were times when going through it again, that I wished she was. But God saw me through it. And one of my childhood best friends was at the hospital at 7am surgery day with a Mocha frappuccino from Starbucks in hand. All I could do was smile. I'm not sure she knows how much that meant to me. Jake's Pulmonary veins are now larger and he has a new adult sized valve. So hopefully he won't have to have anymore surgeries for many more years.

Probably the biggest change is that my family left our church of 17 years. That was a huge move for me. I was forced to get outside of my comfort zone. It has stretched me for the better. God had been moving me and my family to leave for sometime. And a couple months ago God flashed a big neon sign in our faces that said, "It's TIME!!". However this also means that I no longer have a mission board lined up to take me after I have my RN license. And all of my references are probably shot. :) But that's okay. As much as I have always wanted to go on the foreign mission field I really feel like God has been stirring my heart to domestic ministry with some short term foreign mission trips in the mix. But what do I know?!?! I didn't think I would be here. Who knows where I will be in five years. And God is God and I'm not. So there could still be some unburnt bridges out there. I'm really happy at my new church though. It's the first time in a long time that I actually look forward to going to church.

So that is an update on me. I'm a nursing student, trying to keep my head above water in the ocean of homework. Blessed with a new church. A new outlook on life. A brother with a new valve. And friends that I love, no matter how many nuts this Squirrel collects.

.... I'm impressed. I didn't mention coffee once. Whoops. Guess I did now. :)